Monday, 5 February 2018

Battle of the Bayou

'But why, Piglet?'
'Tigger says that it's the patriotic mood of the hour…'
'So we must participate.'
'I see.  So…a film about what was happening in The Hundred-Acre Wood during their Second World War.'
'What was happening?'
'Tigger says it's not about what was happening.  It's about what can be made to happen now that they can say was happening then.'
'So what will be happening now that was or wasn't happening then…then?'
'Ah, well, Tigger's going to use the bridge over the stream for the famous meeting.'
'Famous meeting?'
'When General de Gaulle presented Winston with a Parisian tabby to say, you know, ta for letting the Free French stay.'
'Ah.…I see.  Hence the phrase "Chat to Churchill".'
'Thing is, Pooh, Tigger has you and me in mind to be part of de Gaulle's entourage, so I'm learning the lingo and I'd advise you to get weaving too.'
'Weavers, were they?'
'Busy bees, Pooh.  Working on back-channel diplomacy.'
'I get a touch of that if the honey's off.  So we'd be in the entourage?'
'Or as they would say…'
'Bit of a cheek, pinching our word.'
'Ah, well, Tigger says that it all dates from 1812 when the English took the Bayou Tapestry over to Normanton.'
'France.  They pinched that as well.  And the Bayou Tapestry will be central to Tigger's film.'
'What is it?'
'History in the eye, Tigger says.'
'In the eye?'
'Bit of an opthalmic issue at one point, apparently.'
'What about all the other points?'
'Oh, now, Pooh, they're what you'd expect in the Bayou Tapestry.'
'Oh, you know…bluesmen with dobros drawn, disputes about 'Midnight Special' starting in G or C sharp.  All that.'
'Ah.  So…an unrestful time in the Wood for the next while...'
'Gary Oldman's playing a tussock.'
'Last word in versatility, him.'